I was shopping for my weekly groceries. Usually I picked up the same items: eggs, milk, bread, etc. As I waited in line I glanced at the items surrounding the register and came across a beautiful set of tits. I say tits because I really dont have much respect for Jessica Simpson, and she has big tits. It may be immature and crass, but what else is really going to get many men to look at Cosmo Magazine. I glanced past left tit to see an interestingly large font with the word orgasm in it.
“Your Orgasm Face, what he’s thinking when he sees it.”
I found this so hysterical. I sat there in line, not reading the article, but thinking of all those orgasm faces I have seen. Some have been frightening and others pure entertainment. There have only been two that have mutually been enjoyed.
Now obviously I cannot use names for the sake of some of the readers but I can surely describe to you some of the faces I have encountered.
The Snarling Orgasm Face – This one is quite frightening. One girl I dated happened to love oral more than anything in the world. Now sadly this did not include the idea or thought of giving me oral, but simply taking it and avoiding blowjobs at any or all costs. I recall glancing up at her orgasm face and wondering what the fuck was going on up there. She would clinch her teeth and make this snarl that was quite honestly one of the least sexy and unattractive things I have ever seen in a woman.
The Girl Who Laughs/Moans Orgasm Face – Fuck this. Any time she laughs I wonder if I am doing something wrong or if she is just fucking nuts. Usually she is just fucking nuts. It starts out with little moans and then a giggle, followed by a moaning laugh and silence. It is so confusing and leaves me wondering what the fuck was so funny because Im not laughing.
The Crazy Screaming Bitch That Wakes Your Neighbors Orgasm Face – This one may be a wild ride but god forbid you have thin walls and neighbors that wake up early. I had a girl over at my place once and had warned her that my neighbor’s head is literally on the other side of that drywall. That did not stop her from letting him know she was having sex. I got the half nod of approval, half nod dont let it fucking happen again from my neighbor that next morning. It wasnt her fault, she just cant help but let it all loose. God damn is it hard to concentrate…it does make you feel like a fucking well-endowed man though.
The Passionate Orgasm Face – This one is great. She moans as the sex intensifies. You can feel her thoughts with her moans and her warm breath on your neck and shoulders. These are the girls that curse a lot and say your name as they are about to orgasm. They love sex and make you love it even more.
The Girl Who Bites Her Lower Lip Orgasm Face – This is my favorite one. I once had love with a girl that loved me than I could ever ask for and I pushed her away. Not a day goes by that I dont wish I could have another chance with her, learning from my mistakes over the years. She was an amazing person and a better lover. She understood what sex was supposed to be not just for her, but for the two of you as one. God damn.